If I Had A Heart
by xPaige Turnerx
Summary: I could love you. -a little "what if" au for Species. Or canon to the fanfic, if y'all are sadists- Don't have to read Species but it'd have more impact if you did. Sad, pathetic little sleep-deprived oneshot.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Twilight.

 **Rated:** T.

 **Author:** xPaige Turnerx

 **Summary:** I could love you. -a little "what if" au for Species. Or canon to the fanfic, if y'all are sadists- Don't have to read Species but it'd have more impact if you did. Oneshot.

 _'This will never end 'cause I want more_

 _More, give me more_

 _Give me more.'_

Infuriating.

Isabella Marie Swan was _infuriating_ , she was vexing, irritating, aggravating, she. Was. Bothersome. She was, she really, really was. Rosalie knew this, Rosalie told herself this on a daily basis, reminded herself, convinced herself. Isabella is infuriating. _Isabella_ is infuriating. Not endearing. Not charming. Not _cute._ Rosalie did not find her cute, Rosalie did not find anyone cute. Cute was not even in her vocabulary and if she thought on it, recalled every moment of her past, she was confident that she'd never even uttered the word _cute._

"Don't be cute, Isabella," she snapped with her arms crossed over her chest.

 _Fuck._

Those elegant dark brows lifted in mild surprise and there was only time enough for Rosalie to clench her jaw before they were waggling above her reflective glasses. Rosalie's grip on her forearms tightened, she listened to that drum in Bella's chest kick up into the next gear, and braced herself.

Bella tapped her fingers on the cool tile of the kitchen island countertop, leaning forward to peer up at Rosalie. "Would you ask a bird not to fly, Rosalie? A fish not to swim? A sun not to shine? We are what we are, I can't help that you find me unbelievably cute."

"I did not say unbelievably," Rosalie tried to interject.

Pushing off from the island, Bella spun to the window looking out over the side yard where Esme's frozen garden stood. She held up her arms. "Supremely cute! Fantastically cute! My adorableness, as you've pointed out, is effortless. Thus, I cannot stop, and you're doomed to swoon over me forever."

The cheeky grin on Bella's face stirred something in Rosalie's chest when she finally turned back to the blonde, something that was quickly snuffed out by fear. The practised indifference on Rosalie's face morphed into a hostile scowl, one that had Bella faltering and the grin fading. The sight of Bella _dimming_ , because of _her_ , because she could not just... _be_ around Bella, soured Rosalie even more. "Is this where we pretend that you're not _petrified_ by the thought that not even one person in your dark, little miserable life could well and truly like you, never mind two. That maybe Alice made a mistake. Maybe she changed her mind. You got lucky once, by some miracle you captured the interest of a little dancing angel, but how would you ever do it again? How would you ever find a _second_ person to love you?"

A heavy, painful silence fell over the kitchen. Rosalie stared down at Bella, eyes boring into her reflection in those glasses. She shifted her gaze to the girl's lips, unable to stand looking at herself a second longer. Those glasses... why did she always have to wear those damn glasses?

Bella shoved her hands into her back pockets and coughed out a weak chuckle. A false smile stretched across her lips and she looked off to the patio doors while Rosalie silently, internally shattered. "Pretty sure they got an app for that," Bella joked softly.

The moment Rosalie moved, let her arms drop to her sides, Bella's gaze snapped to the floor. Chin tucked to her chest, she leaned backwards, an agonizing twist of submitting and disengaging all at once. Giving in. Giving up. On Rosalie. Because of Rosalie. Because she'd crossed a line she wasn't aware of. Had gone from teasing, from almost playful bickering, to hurting. She hurt Bella.

With a crack, Rosalie slammed her hand down on the countertop to snatch up her phone, and was gone the next second. She blurred through the dark garage to a familiar corner, where her convertible sat waiting to be polished. She sat on the door and with a dramatic sigh, flung herself backwards into the drivers' seat. Sideways, with her legs hanging out over the door, to stare up at the ceiling of the garage.

Inside the house, she could hear the teenager drag her feet towards the living room and turn on the television. Whose great idea it was to leave Rosalie alone with the girl while everyone else went hunting, she didn't know, but they had a world of pain coming their way. A mistake she would not make again. She couldn't be trusted not to hurt Bella.

Agony clutched at Rosalie's heart, the image of Bella's falling smile etched onto the back of her eyelids. There forevermore, whenever she closed her eyes.

"You know, for how much you love the girl, you verbally attack her quite often." As usual, Edward announced his presence with his usual grating way; stating the obvious in an effort to get her thoughts he already had access to. He not only ripped them from her mind but demanded that she had them up on a silver platter as well. "I do not. I was merely remarking my observations and going to note that Bella would probably tell you that's your way of flirting."

" _I know!"_ Rosalie hissed. She could _see_ it, hear Bella saying those very words, with that damn smirk. Teasing, taunting, always poking. Worse yet, Rosalie could see herself smiling. Laughing. Because of course Bella wouldn't be offended, would actually enjoy it. Would probably find it endearing, herself. "What do you want, Edward?"

She felt the car jostle and listened to Edward fall backwards, matching her position in the passenger's seat. She refrained from snarling at him, too tired to pick a fight. Too upset, scared of going too far and hurting _another_ person she cared for. As graceful as she was, it was a slippery slope she often fell down.

"I understand," Edward murmured and she could picture him wincing. "Sorry. I know you hate it when I address your thoughts directly. The good thing about being a mind reader, however, is that I always know your intentions, Rosalie. You never accidentally offend or hurt me. It's always intentional." He paused a moment and chuckled. "And yes, I usually deserve it."

A deep sigh heaved Rosalie's chest. "Don't make me repeat myself, Edward."

"I came back early," he replied gently. "Not much in the mood to hunt today, I thought I would instead spend time with Bella. She's been eyeballing my piano lately, so to speak. Instead, I heard your exchange in the kitchen, was drawn in by the chaos in your mind, and sought to soothe your own hurt."

She scowled up at the ceiling, crossing one leg over the other, still dangling over the door. "You're making it increasingly difficult to be rude to you."

"Apologies," Edward chuckled. His grin faded into a soft, sad smile. "I don't envy your position, Rose. It is... complicated, and I think you've handled it with more grace than anyone else could."

The heavy feeling in her chest intensified. "Her face. After I said those awful things, her face... all the cheer just drained out of it. Yet I have seen people say things _twice_ as malicious and she didn't even bat an eyelash, she just lets it roll off her back."

"I would argue the most logical point being that Bella does not care what others think of her, what they say to her. You, on the other hand, she seems to care a great deal about."

"That doesn't make me feel better."

Edward hummed. "On some degree, it does."

"Does that make me a horrible person?"

"You know I think you're one of the best people I've ever met, Rosalie," Edward said firmly. With conviction. She sucked in a sharp breath and glared a hole in the corner of the ceiling. "The very fact you're out here, working so hard to distance yourself, I... I could not do it. I don't think anyone else under this roof could do it."

Rosalie crossed her arms over her chest. If he was just going to keep addressing it... she might as well discuss it. Get his thoughts. "Do you believe Fate could be so astonishingly callous that it would destine two different vampires to one single mate?" she asked quietly, thoughtfully. Her fingers dug into her biceps again, jaw clenched tight enough the flare up in pain. "And that it would happen to _me_? That the other vampire would be _Alice_. And that the mate would be _Isabella_?" She let out a deep breath through her nose, blinking slowly. "If it were any other human..."

"You wouldn't want her," Edward supplied.

Black eyes slid closed, full of pain and longing. "If it were anyone other than Alice..."

"You wouldn't think twice about taking her."

Lips trembled until she squeezed them together. Another jagged breath. "Emmett deserves better. They all deserve better."

"So do you."

The corner of the garage lit up, Rosalie's phone on the dashboard vibrating loudly in the silence. She sighed deeply and snatched it up, blinking up at the new message.

 **Call: Waifu**

 **Sorry for hacking your phone and changing all your contacts. Upon consideration, it was, perhaps, a tad too far over the line you had clearly drawn. I'll send you a key to change them all back. Also, stop moping in the garage, you're gonna steal Ed's broody gimmick. Birds fly, fish swim, and roses have thorns. It would not be a rose without the thorn.**

 **Bella (the cutest)**

A smile curled Rosalie's lips up moments before Edward's indignant scoff had her actually chuckling. "I do _not_ brood!" he exclaimed and was up out of the car in seconds. She listened to the door connecting the garage and house swing open. "Bella! I don't brood! I battle melancholy heroically and gorgeously, I might add."

Setting her phone down on her shirt over her heart, Rosalie sighed softly. She waited until Edward's latest composition filled the house and floated into the garage before she finally got up. Flicking the lights on, she blurred around the room for her overalls and tools, and headed to the farthest corner.

Clunky, awkward notes cut into Edward's seamless playing and once again, Rosalie could hear her brother squawk at the girl. She rolled her eyes and grabbed the corner of the tarp, giving one swift yank. There Old Buggy sat, his hood up, waiting for Rosalie to return and continue her work to restore him.

Her words were cutting, forged into weapons long ago, out of necessity. Unable to dull them, or dull them fast enough, Rosalie knew she could at least control her actions. Knew that, despite what she said, Bella was smart enough to pick up on what was often left unsaid. That sometimes silence said more than words could. That actions, gestures, and timing could convey a message no speech ever would.

And knew that if she didn't say it, eventually Bella would. That she could issue an unspoken challenge that the teenager could not refuse because Isabella Swan was _just_ as stubborn as Rosalie Hale.

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **Listen. LISTEN. I'm so tired. I'm so, so tired. But I had this thought and I was like "oh hey, it'll take just a second" but a second DOESNT MATTER WHEN IT'S THIS LATE AND YOU'RE THIS TIRED. So here we go. A short little blip of... idk, something. My thought. I had this thought. This sadistic thought. "What if Rosalie is in love with Bella in Species? That'd fucking suck for her. Trying so hard not to like Bella, to convince herself she doesn't, because Bella and Alice are perfect for each other and love each other, but so are Rosalie and Bella, and so does Rosalie and Bellaaaaa. And just, like, now they're stuck in Valhalla together, they keep getting thrown together while Rose is trying to be the bigger person and not fuck things up between everyone. Pretty shitty, eh?" Also had the thought that Edward KNOWS and he wants to help but it's not really a situation that you CAN help. But then at the dance, Bella goes and says Rosalie is _wonderful_ and shit, super thoughtful stuff, and he's like "damn, maybe it's them? Maybe it's Rose and Bella?" so he's all "ooooh, go tell her that" and fuckin. I don't know. I'm so tired. And I blame Cloud for my new Rosella fascination.**

 **And yes, I'm currently working on the sequel for Species. As I have NONE of it pre-written, I'll probably be updating that one as chapters are completed. So keep an eye out.**

 **peace**

 **paige (the exhausted)**


End file.
